So Russia has attacked and invaded another country.  Where are the peace marches?  Oh, that’s right, they are only against the United States going after evil bastards.  They have no problems with another country attacking a peaceful neighbor.
So where are the United Nations resolutions?  Oops, they aren’t Israel.  So no resolutions.
I’ve done more than the [...]

I was at a restaurant with some friends and because I had mentioned that I thought the waitress was hot, they started chatting it up with her in an effort to break the ice.  When the waitress mentioned her name was Miranda, I tried to come up with a witty response about her name and [...]